By Brad Haire
University of
Georgia

At some point in life, everyone will be bullied. It will most likely happen at school. But these days, it can happen online, which can be worse.

Bullying can include physical or emotional abuse, damage to a child’s property, spreading malicious rumors or forcing a child to do something he or she doesn’t want to do, says Sharon Gibson, a family and consumer science educator with University of Georgia Cooperative Extension.

Kids today can be cyber-bullied, too, she said.

“The difference is how far the verbal assault can spread and how fast it can spread. Technology propels bullying beyond the schoolyard or neighborhood to the world through the Web,” Gibson said.

There are many ways to be cyber-bullied. The most common way is hurtful or threatening instant messages. Other forms include creating a Web site or blog. A blog is a Web site where entries are made in journal style and displayed in reverse chronological order. Pictures taken with a cell phone or digital camera can also be e-mailed, printed or posted to Web sites.

Bullies can broadcast polls to get voters to cast their opinions on who belongs at the top of such condescending categories as dumbest or fattest, she said. The results are either shared with all the voters through email or posted to Web sites.

Many kids use social networking sites. Parents should know who their child’s cyber friends are, how much personal information their child is posting and who can view their profile.

It is important to remember that a consistently bullied student can have emotional problems and perform poorly in school. And if the bullying is physical, it can take its toll on the student’s body.

Don’t ignore the problem. And don’t tell your child to ignore the bully.

“When a child is bullied, he or she may feel angry, helpless or deserted,” Gibson said. “If that child tells a teacher or parent about the bullying, he or she needs to know it’s not tattling and that speaking about it was the right thing.”

Parents should stay calm. Ask for a meeting with the principal of your child’s school. The principal can then determine if and when to bring the child’s teacher into the conversation.

“Again, parents should stay calm. If they’re not, this could set up a defensive action by school officials,” she said. “Parents should be proactive but not demanding before they learn more about the situation at school.”

Teachers and principals are trained to deal with issues like bullying, she said. So voice your concerns, but listen, too.

Most schools have an action plan to deal with bully situations. If the school doesn’t, offer to help develop a plan.

A bullied child should have an adult contact at school to tell if the bullying doesn’t stop. This person could be a teacher or a paraprofessional. But they can have their hands full all day. It can be tough to concentrate on one child.

Gibson recommends setting up a code word for the bullied child to use when he or she feels uncomfortable due to bullying. This will inform the adult in the classroom without the child having to raise a hand or bring much attention. The adult can then investigate or even witness the bullying.

Follow up with the school to make sure steps are in place to keep your child and all children from being bullied.

At home, encourage good social skills and behavior. Help your child find his or her talents, and praise accomplishments.

“A confident, assertive child is less likely to be the target of a bully,” she said.

(Brad Haire is a news editor with the University of Georgia College of Agricultural and Environmental Sciences.)